Fete With The Saints 2023
Fete With The Saints or as some people call it Fete With TANA School (what? it have people does call it dat) was epic with a capital PIC!
The decor was straight out of Lord of the Rings or somebody back yard in Lopinot. Allyuh remember them hanging baskets everybody mother or aunt had in the porch, well it had people dressed Iike that by the entrance. If you didn't make them out at first, when they moved they scared the bejesus out of you...so I was told.
Padna if you see birds. The ladies come out fuh dem in their best Can-Can and tight dress. I mean gal does come out the woodwork like termite for "d Cyanival" but it's the amount of them in this fete was impressive. I suppose it had good looking and well dressed men there too but you'll have to read somebody else blog to hear bout man.
The food was excellent as usual. There were food stations like whoa. The lines were manageable except for the meat lines and the raw fish (sushi) line. FWTS doh give you no finger food either. Is proper ting garçon. There was an assortment of dead flesh and carbs including pig foot souse. They even catered for a "vegetable" like me. We had quinoa and whole wheat bao (basically a stoosh pow), crab stuffed dumplings, fish and Singapore noodles, salmon and pasta, seafood salad and fish ceviche.
Drinks were premium as usual. There was no long wait or issues in getting drinks at the bar other than me having to educate every single bartender on what gin was. There were the usual drinks stations: Patron, Grey Goose, Tanqueray, Guinness, The Botanist (gin), a couple champagne bars etc.
"Current" (electricity) went in the middle section of the fete in the earlies. I didn't even notice to be honest. Apparently there was too much load on the generators. One would think they would know by now how to manage that. However, the stage still had power, the DJ still had power, food and drinks was still sharing, so no harm no foul.
The party had a real stoosh vibe at first, probably because people were eating and mingling with friends they ain't see since before the apocalypse of 2020-2021.
FWTS was like a mini Army fete with the amount of artistes performing. First up was Sekon Sta and he was struggling to get any kind of crowd reaction, not because he wasn't good, but because half the party was fighting the "itis" after stuffing their face and the other half was at the champagne bar. Them ladies rush that bar like "never-see come-see" or like "Sando come to town". What? Allyuh know Sando is country to me.
Next up was Voice and it felt like he was on stage forever. I went to eat, get drinks, run a Savannah, come back and he was still singing. He brought on some of my favorite B-listers like Vaughn, Lil Natty and Thunda,
Nailah and Skinny. Sorry, no the last two came out on their own. Let me just say that while I hate Nailah part of the song, "Come Home" is the song to beat for road march so far.
At some point we got Lyrikal, meh bredren Shal Marshall (large up yuhself big head) and Ding Dong. Speaking of Ding Dong...I doh understand how he still have that size with all that performance he does give. The man does reaaaal perform. All kinda jump and ting....ok, not a real jump jump but still.
Then the Viking and his plus one came on stage. I just want someone tell Bunji to blink twice if he's under duress. Watch meh...plain talk bad manners, Fay-Ann almost mash up the fete. Every time Bunji hype up the crowd with a hit, she bring we back down to almost a slumber with s***. I feel they does car pool but she could drop him off and go run Chancellor or Breezy Hill and 2 Savannah and swing for him after. Go for ice cream nah and let the man sing.
Bunji gave us a sample of his road mix for Hard Fete and let me tell unno...Come Home better look over its shoulder because Hard Fete coming round that bend in the 200m like Usain Bolt and Michael Johnson love child.
Then out of nowhere the big surprise. The Queen of Bacchanal come on with long blonde braids looking like that puppet Janice from the Muppet Show. Destra first song get the kind of forward Fayann was trying to get for her entire set. That was when the vibes start to wake up.
Then all of a sudden the unthinkable happened. We swear the DJ was playing a track with her and Machel until we see the Monk himself walk on the stage. I am no kinda Machel fan but I have to admit he came out like a super hero to save the day. It was like Double M mixed with Super Grover. It was Machel and Destra, then Machel and Patrice, then Machel and Machel. The crowd was in a frenzy, gyal was rendering their garments, I feel somebody tanty throw a bingos on stage. It was pandemonium!!
Then the soca Adam Levine come on to finish mashing up the fete. Of course he bring on the big man himself, the real boss in the business, the "all who following Iwer George for 20 years put yuh two hand in d air!!"...to sing Stage Gone Bad.
The after party section had KFC, rituals and doubles among other things. 1 am and men ordering a 15 doubles with slight.
Ladies and gentlemen, the judges have scored it 100-0, 100-0, 100-0. The winner by unanimous decision and still!!! the undisputed, heavyweight, best premium all-inclusive in the worllllllld!!! FWTS!!
PS: Doh forget to support them other schools fete too eh. Children are the future...except the duncy ones.
TANA