Crunch Brunch All-Inclusive 2024
This weekend we attended Crunch Brunch All-inclusive Fete in Normandie. To be fair to the fete in this review I need to give some context. If you recall, as a result of the residents in St Clair being against fun, the organizers had to change venues which no doubt impacted things like catering and other logistics.
Right....so as we got to Normandie we thought we were in the wrong place. We didn't see any cars or people or hear any music. I even asked security if there was actually a fete there.
For those who know the location because they fed up runaway during their lunch hour for a secret rendezvous with the big bumsee ting from Accounting or beard man from Security, the actual fete was located up in the back courtyard. The atmosphere was warm and humid. Thank God for them two industrial strength Lasko fans near the stage.
The fete wasn't packed when we got there and didn't totally fill out throughout the night but to be fair, Crunch was also competing with a whole host of events happening on the same night and even some in the same area.
The ladies were dress-up nice-nice in their all-inclusive Can-Can dresses. I saw someone in a hat, blouse and pants so tight you could count the coins in his pocket. There was one young lady from Boston in a florescent green crochet two piece outift like she dressed for Stink and Dutty.
The food options weren't great. This was the first time in my history of going all-inclusive parties where I, having seen the menu in advance, opted to eat before going out. Maybe they should have made the party a drinks inclusive with cutters.
I'm generally not a fan of DJ's incessant chattering and verbosity but yesterday Crunch needed Patrick the Hypeman and Travis World like J Angel need to stop wearing that cyat suit and going up on people table. Them fellas wuk hard to build a vibes in the sweltering heat.
The party was swinging by the time they passed the baton to Lurbz. Lurbz and dem kept the vibes going until the rain started to fall. That was when the vibes went up another notch. As some people scampered for shelter for fear their hair might unstick or they face might wash off, others partied on in the rain. As I always say, water = vibes. If your party going stale just fill a bucket and start throwing it on people...then yuh go see bacchanal.
At this point I want digress to say a heart felt congratulations to Lurbz who announced to the party that he is now engaged to be married...to his own gyal (ooh guuud...yuh real stink bai Tana). I just hope karma gives him a bligh.
The bar wasn't the most extensive but they had gin so I was happy, doh mind the cups were so small two sips and yuh drink done. I was still happy until the bartender told me gin finished. As I was on my way to set fire to the stage and kick down the DJ laptop, they told me they made a mistake, Gordon's was done but they still had Tanqueray. Phew...mayhem averted. Someone told me that rum finished but das not my problem.
The DJ "who shall remain nameless" came on next and started of shaky. It was like he find the party was pumping too much and proceeded to slow it down. However, I have to admit he came good eventually and the crowd was buzzing. In front the stage was pandemonium. It was like a cooler fete, water party and Bacchanal road was having a three-some. Miss Boston was in a state of euphoria, all on the ground, jumping, dancing having a time. She was a whole vibe by herself. She definitely got her money's worth.
People were sheltering and jamming on the stage. At one point I tried to jump up on the stage and almost didn't make it. Thank God for all them leg exercises.
Despite the issues Crunch was pure vibes. In my view, any promoter can throw an event with the best food, drinks, decorations but what they cannot manufacture is atmosphere and Crunch had that in abundance.
I always bash the DJs when they drag the flag but at Crunch they were the true MVPs...
them and Miss Boston. They need to give her a prize.
TANA